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Commitment Issues in Relationships and Dating: Advice by Relationship Psychologist Nancy Wesson, Ph.D
Relationship Commitment • Am
I Ready? • Partner
Choice • Home
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What Makes It So Hard for Some People
to
Make a Commitment in a Relationship?
© Nancy Wesson, Ph.D.
It is because some people have fear about commitment. These
are some of the common fears of committing:
- Fear of losing control over one's self or one's life.
- Fear of betrayal by another person.
- Fear of being vulnerable and dependent upon one's partner
or fear of a partner being dependent on you.
- Fear of losing one's financial resources.
- Fear of divorce.
- Fear of being a victim of abuse.
Am I Ready for Commitment?
© Nancy Wesson, Ph.D.
You should be able to answer yes to most of the statements
below in order to be ready for a true commitment:
- I am ready and able to give up my identity as a single person.
- I have been emotionally stable for at least six months.
- I feel I am ready to put my relationship needs ahead of my
personal needs when necessary.
- I am ready to decrease my ties to my immediate family and
put this energy into my relationship.
- I am able to keep my work from interfering with my relationship.
- I feel ready to merge my life with someone else.
- I have been monogamous sexually and emotionally for at least
the past six months and I am commited to staying monogamous.
Handling Conflict or Disagreements
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When things get hard with my partner I feel I can commit
to talking about the disagreement even if I am uncomfortable.
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I can commit to talking about my feelings and continuing
to talk about problems until the conflict is thoroughly worked
through or a compromise is reached.
Partner Choice and Commitment
© Nancy Wesson, Ph.D.
In choosing a partner you should be able to say yes to almost
all of the statements below:
- She or he wants a commitment with me.
- She or he has been stable emotionally for at least six months.
- She or he is available and has the time to make our relationship
healthy.
- She or he is willing to talk through a disagreement.
- She or he can put relationship needs ahead of personal needs
when necessary.
- I feel cared for and comfortable with my partner.
- My partner has been sexually and emotionally monogamous for
the past six months.
- My partner's values match mine fairly well.
- My partner and I are most often in agreement in how to spend
time and money.
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For an appointment for counseling for relationship issues, shyness,
self-esteem issues, codependency, or other psychological concerns call or text:
Dr. Nancy Wesson at (650) 965-7332 • E-mail Dr.
Nancy Wesson
Professional background & approach to counseling
of Nancy Wesson, Ph.D.
My office is located on the Mountain View, CA - Palo Alto border, one block off of San Antonio Rd.
Directions to Mountain View / Palo Alto, CA Office.
Psychologist offering psychotherapy, counseling and advice for relationships, social anxiety, depression, codependency, self-esteem, dating, and life change in the South San Francisco Bay Area: Mountain View CA, Palo Alto, Los Altos, Sunnyvale, Saratoga, Cupertino, Campbell, Santa Clara, Los Gatos, Atherton, Redwood City, San Jose, San Mateo, California.
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